Rule 5 of Cosmetic Work - A Deep Dive
No more than two cosmetic surgeries per body part in a lifetime.
Caveat: this rule excludes reconstructive cosmetic surgery which is often complex and can require multiple surgeries, sometimes over many years.
This rule is also specific to surgeries and excludes non-surgical procedures.
I know, I know. How can I cruelly cut you off like this…
But, I am unshakable in my position that no-one (excepting the above caveat) should need more than two operations on any body part1. My entire mission with Not Born With It is to ensure that any work that may you choose to have is realistic, intentional, conscious and well-researched.
Get it done once, well, and never think about it again, should be the goal here.
Obviously, some procedures, particularly those geared towards resisting gravitational forces, may be less effective over time, but I believe that two go-arounds should be enough for any lifetime.
If you find yourself tempted to go for a 3rd, 4th or 5th anything (noses and boobs are the most common ‘revision’ surgeries), you need to consider:
Have you waited the stipulated amount of time for the surgery to have matured and settled? No ethical surgeon should be considering a consultation or operation until this amount of time has passed, no matter how impatient you may be.
Are you continually getting ‘botched’ work? Have you researched your surgeon thoroughly and had detailed conversations (and these should be dialogues, where both of you speak for roughly the same amount of time), during at least two separate consultations with them, about what your desired outcome is and whether their expertise is compatible this?
If you have kept going to the cheapest provider possible and find that the resulting work is unprofessional and poorly done, consider instead going for a consultation with a specialist (probably more expensive) surgeon. This will almost certainly save you money and mental anguish in the long-term.
Are your outcomes realistic? Any ethical surgeon will give you pragmatic guidance on this, and possibly a reality check. If you’re not happy with the ultimate result:
Did you research your surgeon thoroughly and only proceed once you fully understood their approach, philosophy and techniques?
Were you honest about the outcome you were after?
Really?
If you secretly hoped that Procedure X would make your ex want you back, but what you told your surgeon was: “I’d like this bump removed from my nose”, those are two wildly different things and a surgeon can only help make the latter a reality.
Did you listen to and understand your surgeon’s advice? When paying for surgery, the surgeon’s opinion and guidance are some of the most valuable things that you purchase in that transaction.
If your surgeon has told you that they can’t make you look like J-Lo2, but they can give you a clear representation of what is acheivable within the parameters of your existing face and body and their skillset, it is not your surgeon’s fault if you wake up from surgery livid that you don’t look like J-Lo.
Unless you are J-Lo, RUN from any surgeon’s office if the surgeon tells you that they can make you look like J-Lo.I’m not kidding.
Cosmetic work is not about turning you into a facsimile of someone else. It’s about working with your existing unique features and characteristics, perhaps bringing them into balance, and finding a version of you that makes you smile at your reflection.
If you start off a consultation by brandishing images of other people and saying “I want this nose/hairline/face shape” etc, a reputable surgeon should immediately, but gently, advise you that their work is about enhancing your own face, not slapping someone else’s physiognomy3 onto yours.
Part of the intentionality of surgery should also be with the ‘2’ limit in mind. If you’re only ‘allowed’ to have 2 facelifts, it probably makes sense to wait until you’re at least in your fifties (by which time, you may no longer even want one) to start, rather than getting one at 45 ‘pre-emptively’ and then getting another every 5 years after that, until eventually, you end up looking like this.
Do not end up looking like this.
If you’re still sceptical, think about anyone that you’re aware of who’s had more than 2 cosmetic surgeries on a single body part and decide for yourself whether they seem content, well-adjusted and happy with the way that they look. If you can think of one, please send them my way, I’d be fascinated to chat to them.
Any cosmetic work undertaken should be in accordance with the other five rules. Here they are, in case you missed them the first time…
